So two things that I achieved this month:
(A) Finishing the mini-marathon and not coming in last, waheyyy! This is my fourth time walking the Dublin 10km marathon, and as I mentioned last month, on the other three occasions I romped home in the last ten people. This meant that the musicians along the route were all dismantling their equipment as we trundled past, and the medals were being packed away in a van by the time we finally reached the end. So it was nice this year to be in the middle of it all with the Kare4Kasey gang, and even nicer that the sun shone, unlike the last time, when the torrential rain made it even harder. We finished it in 2 hours and 15 minutes, which is 25 minutes faster than last time. I was quite pleased at the result, as was Karen Barody, my fitness consultant at The Hospital Group. Obviously Sonia O’Sullivan can rest easy for another few months, but if I end up skinny by next year, she’ll need to watch her back!
(B) Buying a dress in size 22, rather than my normal 28-30. While 22 isn’t exactly Kate Middleton territory, it means that I can now fit into clothes from some high-street stores. Up to now, I had a handful of shops, online sites and boutiques to choose from, but the thing about shops for big people is that their clothes tend to have equally big price tags – New Look being the honourable exception. I would prefer to buy Irish, but for some reason, Irish fat shops charge ridiculous prices sometimes, possibly because they presume we have no other choice. They’re wrong though as we do. I bought a dress from an online US site last year, and it was delivered to my house for €120 less than it was selling for in a larger ladies’ boutique in Dublin.
While I don’t want to spend a lot on clothes that hopefully won’t fit me in a few months, I had to buy two dresses this month. One for a charity event that I was hosting for baby Kasey, and the other for my friend Rita’s wedding. So I went looking and the lack of choice was staggering – the few things that I might have considered wearing were so hideously expensive I couldn’t afford them. I ended up ordering online from Dressbarn in the US, which was a right palaver as they don’t deliver to Ireland so I had to have them delivered to my friend Sylvia in Denver. She immediately posted one dress on to me so I would get it in time and brought the other one home with her – it was her sister’s wedding, you see.
When you consider that Dressbarn cancelled my order initially as I paid with an Irish credit card, my cousin Donna in LA had to step in and pay with her credit card, and then the US customs returned the parcel to Sylvia as some form wasn’t filled in properly, it was a miracle that the dress landed at my door on the day of the event. It was too long and I had no time to get it taken up but I was happy to have it anyway. I wore the second dress to the wedding (pictured) and that one was perfect. And breaking with my habit of a lifetime, I didn’t wear a long cardigan with it, just one of those things that cover your arms. We fatties should never bare our arms in my opinion – there is nothing worse. Well, apart from letting it all hang out in leggings and t-shirts! So everybody was very complimentary about my three-and-a-half stone weight loss, and they loved the dress, which cost me all of $45 (€36). Admittedly, and most serendipitously, there was a one-day sale on the day I bought it, but it was still worth the hassle it took to get to wear it. Irish shops should take note. Fat people also like to look good but we’re not complete fools either. Stop ripping us off please. Some of you even charge more as the sizes go up, which is outrageous, unless the dress is made of pure silk and studded with Swarovski crystals. Could you imagine the outcry if Dunnes Stores charged more for their size 16s than their size 8s?
So anyway, now that I’ve reached size 22, there are a few high-street shops that I can go to, so that should be good fun. I have to work out a whole new style for myself of course, and I fear that I might look like a bit ridiculous for a little while until I find what suits me – and what I can get away with at 43. Otherwise you’ll find me in Topshop wrestling boob tubes and shorts out of the hands of 15 year olds.
Now that I’m into the upper end of 16 stone, from a starting point of 20 stone 2, I think the loss of the next few stones will be interesting. I don’t really see much of a difference between what I looked like then and now, although other people do. I imagine I will begin to notice the change by the end of the summer, when I am hoping to be 15 stone. Still a baby elephant, but practically skinny for me! People keep asking me if I feel better in myself, as if I was some wheezing, decrepit old heap of flab on legs, but the honest truth is not really. I never felt that my size affected me physically, because as I’m so fond of telling anyone who’ll listen, I am a fairly fit fatty and unlike my skinny-minnie VBFs, I’m never, ever sick. I haven’t been to the doctor in seven years. So I was a bit suspicious when I got very ill this month and had to have antibiotics and everything. I’m still coughing two and a half weeks later. Hmmmmm!
Anyway, it’s summer so I’m going to try to get a few extra walks in and up the intake of salad-y things. I’m doing the HCG diet two weeks on and two weeks off at the moment. and the weight is coming steadily off. Hopefully, there’ll be a lot less of me to love next month!
Andrea is losing weight on the HCG diet, a medically-supervised 500 calorie daily programme, which is supplemented by twice-daily doses of human chorionic gonadotropin (HCG), a hormone that is extracted from the urine of pregnant women. It has been shown to have the effect of increasing the metabolism, and is part of The Hospital Group’s Made to Measure weight-loss programme, which also includes regular sessions with a fitness expert and nutritionist. Please call 1850 204 090 or visit www.hospitalgroup.ie for further information.